How to create a sexy bedroom environment (and get a better sleep)

*Special guest post by Sarah from The Sleep Advisor!

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Good news everyone – there’s another HUGE benefit to having sex. (Yay!)

Sex helps us sleep. No, I’m not talking about during the act, or even that awkward post-coital moment when he hasn’t rolled off you but has somehow managed to fall into slumber instead. Ugh.

I’m talking about that lovely, dreamy slumberland that sex can evoke, that great night’s sleep that’s been eluding you for days – or weeks? months?! – until you’ve had a good ol’ dose of nookie. When it does happen and you slide off into la-la land, you wake up rested. Refreshed. Ready for Round 2 (or 3).

 

But how exactly does sex help me sleep?

Good question. Well, it releases all those feel-good, stay-secure hormones like oxytocin and prolactin, which lead you to feel comfortable, relaxed and drowsy after The Big Moment. Simultaneously, it reduces cortisol levels in the body; that pesky hormone which causes those wheels of anxiety spinning in your stressed-out mind.

And you know what? More sleep can actually increase your libido, leading to – you got it – more sex. Bonus.

I’m intrigued. And I want more! How can I get some?

I’m so glad you asked. Obviously you’re in charge of sending out some serious sex appeal…but I can help you set the scene for what happens next. Because unlike what some porn directors would have you believe, there ain’t nothing sexy about fluorescent lighting

 

Here’s how to create a sexy bedroom environment:

1. Keep your work at the office

Or, if you work from home, make sure that your computer and other wirey-type stuff (technical term, FYI) are kept out of the bedroom. Tripping over chargers or seeing an email flash up in the throes of passion is a sure-fire way to kill the mood. So keep things separate – your work can be elsewhere but your bedroom is strictly for play.

2. Lose the gadgets

Unless, of course, you’re talking about your favourite new toy. What I mean is, your phones and laptops should be kept in another room if you can stand it, or at the very least, switched off when it’s time for bed. For one, the blue light they emit is a bad idea when you’re trying to get to sleep. Those science dudes say so, and I’m inclined to believe them.

Even more important, getting into a habit of binge-watching the latest Netflix hit with your partner won’t exactly get your pulse racing. Well, maybe it will but getting all hot and bothered about Stranger Things isn’t what we’re striving for here. So ditch the gadgets and welcome some ‘quiet time’ instead.

3. Light it up

You might be more of a ‘lights off’ person. Maybe that’s because you’ve only ever done it with a harsh 100-watt staring you in the face. In which case, I don’t blame you – after all nothing looks sexy in that kind of light. (Side note: so why the f**k do so many stores insist on blinding lights in their dressing rooms?!)

Take it from me: sex with the light on is a great idea. But like any good photographer will tell you, it’s all about finding the right light. Whether it comes from a dimmer switch or flickering candles (scented ones are even better), soft lighting helps you look and feel your best. A coloured scarf can also create a romantic glow when thrown over a lampshade; just make sure it isn’t placed over the naked bulb itself. Because we’re not after a fire here – just fireworks!

4. Focus on the senses

You’ve already created a visually pleasing environment, but what about your other senses? Those scented candles I mentioned can work a treat, as can burning some of your favourite essential oils. Or why not use the oils during a sensual massage? Then you’ll be taking care of your sense of smell and touch. Win-win.

Taste? Well, each other, hopefully! But of course there’s all those aphrodisiacs you can try before you even hit the hay. And while we may all not have oysters lying around our fridge, we can certainly give the more accessible ones – like chocolate – a try. Hell, why not bring it into the bedroom with you? Mmm, syrupy…

Sound? That’s easy, get your Barry White going – or maybe something slightly less cheesy – and start your sexy soundtrack to get you both in the mood.

 

5. Invest in the best

So you’ve got a bedroom that’s distraction-free, dimly lit and smelling great. You’ve dined on some delectable foods and those sultry songs have you making straight for the centerpiece of the room.

You both crash onto the bed, in a flurry of passion…and then…a haphazard spring sends you leaping up in pain.

Let’s face it. A saggy mattress or a lumpy pillow don’t exactly scream ‘sexy time’. Of course, there’s always the floor – but for me a comfortable, supportive bed for whatever you get involved in makes a big difference. Mattresses may not come cheap but get the right one and it’ll last you for a lifetime of great sex. Totally worth it.

Now that you’ve got your perfect bedroom environment, what’re you waiting for? Get to bed – you can thank me for the great sleep you’ll have afterwards later.

 

(This was a paid post specifically for http://www.ConfindeltyAshlee.com
Photos by Nine 23 Boudoir and James Urban Photo. Thank you!)

Sola Sync Massager, more than just a toy 

Ladies I have found your soulmate. His/her name is Sola Sync and he/she is a curvy purple babe, soft and smooth and very strong!  Sola is a 10 function wireless remote control vibrator!

Thank you to the lovely people at Betty’s Toy Box for this amazing toy! You have upgraded my life!

Ok I am an avid sex toy fan! If you are new to toys just be advised this is a serious one. Not really for a beginner, unless you really want to invest in your orgasm future. 💜

I have been a huge fan of the hitachi magic wand in the past. It was my go to get it done toy. But now the Sola Sync has taken first place in my heart. I first noticed soft silicone this toy is made of, it is so inviting! Plus the toy is flexible which really accommodates use in any postion.

The Sola is hard in the right places but not uncomfortable. (Trust me I’ve played with toys that have no flexibility.  Ouch!) The Sola grooves with your body and is easy to hold because of the extra long handle. It is even ergonomically sound! How impressive! The damn hitachi wand does not blend/move/flex at all. Its like holding a power tool. Seriously so not sexy or comfortable against your body.

The Sola Sync gives 10 options for speed and patterns. I enjoy some serious power and Sola doesnt let me down! I didn’t even need to use the highest power! 

Another benfit of this wireless rechargable massager is the remote control! So even my husband gets to have fun with this toy while in another room.

This massager is great from start to finish. You can please yourself or partner with a massage on the back or chest. Run slowly down the body and intensify the vibrations by picking 1 of 10 setttings.  Keep it in play during sex too by using as a clitorial stimulator.  Aka a womans best friend. 💜

 Overall I rate this 5 stars and better than the well-known hitachi wand. Out with the old and in with the new! The Sola Sync has it all and will certianly be keeping me a satisfied woman.

This post was sponsored by Betty’s Toy Box. All opinions are my own as I only give honest reviews.  

 How to rock a maxi dress!

It saddens me when plus babes say they can’t wear maxis! This is a bold faced lie! We can all wear anything. The key is wear what you feel great in!

GCGME is the place to go for the maxi of your dreams! They have colors galore, tons of patterns and styles. Ranging in size from small to 4x GCGME really has a lot to offer. From casual summer dress to formal bridal wear you will find it at http://www.gcgme.com

I was gifted the Valerie Cap Sleeve V neck cocktail dress in turquise. This color is so beautiful! I felt like a queen wearing this gorgeous garmet. I especially like the rouching in the bust area that gives the dress something extra.

I am 5’3 and wearing a 2x and it fit perfect! Normally I have to take up maxis but not these. Beyond the fit the material felt smooth and comfortable.  Made of matte jersey (5% spandex) this material flowed over my curves and had a bit of stretch. 

The quality in these dresses is top notch. You could wear a GCGME dress to prom or in a wedding. Dont risk a amazon dress or spend over $100 when GCGME can cater to your needs much better. 

The second dress I got was the Dahlia cross over vneck also in a 2x. I love the sleeves on this one especially. Again this fit like a glove and makes me feel feminie and elegant.

GCGME does also offer shorter dresses, tops, jumpsuits and more. I would highly suggest looking at the gorgeous well made dresses for any occansion. Plus size ladies dont be nervous about a maxi! Wear want you want and be proud of your body! 

Thank you to GCGME for the beautiful gowns! 

All photos by Matthew Mayer from Indianapolis. 

 

Bandit Bras Home Delivery!

Last week I showed you my fav panty subscription offering plus sizes so this week I’m showing you bras! Yay Bras!

The Bandit Shop is a very unique company offering bras to your door! If I can order food and clothes to my door hell yes I need my lingerie delivered also. 

The Bandit Shop stocks beautiful high quality bras made in Europe in sizes 38-48 and DD-K! These bras are impressive boutique style pieces of lingerie for large cups! No more searching online or going to tiny high priced boutiques, now simply subscribe for bras to your door.

I was gifted the red Selena Bra in a size 42E (European sizing remember) and the fit is amazing! The straps and band are a perfect thickness to keep me secure(but not too thick like a grandma bra), the underwire holds me up great and the overall feel is amazing! Plus the detail on this bra is impeccable – love the lace shell design with cutesy jewel in the middle.

This specific bra also comes in black and beige. The Bandit Shop does have a few other bra styles with more to come! You can purchase 1 bra for $65 no subscription. Or you can choose 1 of the 2 subscription options, both saving you money. See both options below:

I am so excited about The Bandit Shop and all they have to offer.  Beyond beautiful high quality bras this is also a amazing company run by a woman who supports other women! Women supporting each other, complimenting one another and, bringing full breasted women together is what I call amazing!

Thank you to The Bandit Shop for a lovely bra! 

Get your subscription started at https://www.thebanditshop.com


Plus size panties to your mailbox!

Finally I found a panty subscription for us big girls! I’ve been searching for months it seems and I am so happy I found Splendies

Three pairs of panties for $16.99 per month delivered to your door! You really can’t beat that price or the cute selections. I choose a variety pack and got 1 thong, 1 brief, and 1 lace boyshort. Perfect! Along with style choices you get 4 subscription options also.

Even better they all fit great! Every woman who loves lingerie needs to get this subscription. It honestly will save you time and money! To your door panty service is the new norm!

My only complaint is 3x is largest size so I wish they went larger and Volupties (plussize) cost $3 more a month than traditional sizes. 

I am absolutley loving this subscription plus its smart! I go through panties like mad so having 3 new pretties show up at my door is brilliant! 

Sign up for your own subscription at www.Splendies.com !

How to find the right strapless bra

I have been fighting with strapless bras since I was a teen! I could never get away with no bra but yet I could never find a flattering and comfortable strapless. I honestly gave up looking until I saw the Strapless Sensation Multi-Way from Curvy Couture.  Their bras and panties are made so well, very high end which is a must for a strapless bra.

 

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Because I have so many black or bright color bras already I decided to go with a more sensible bra, one I could wear under white clothing. I choose the Strapless Sensation which actually has 7 ways to wear it! This is the perfect bra for ANY outfit because it will change as needed.

Top 3 Steps for Finding the best strapless Bra:

  1. Do not be cheap when it comes to quality bras, especially multi-way. You honestly get what you pay for. Plus as a curvy woman we have even more obstacles so fit must be spot on!

  2. Look for plastic stay in place lining around band. This “gripper” of sorts holds bra in place on your skin.

  3. Don’t worry about ribbons and pretty bows, you need to make sure the girls don’t make a unannounced appearance.

A very important must have for any multi way bra is the stay in place strips. This bra not only has these strips around the entire band but also on the straps! This is prefect to hold even the largest girls in place.

I paired this bra with the essential boyshort that feels luscious on my skin. This panty is nylon and spandex with a hint of tummy control. Very comfortable easy panty to wear. I know this is a well made set I will have for a long time. Not only does it fit well and wear well but it goes with any wardrobe item. Everyone needs a bra what is able to change with them and this is the one for me.

See all the available high end intimidates selections at www.curvycouture.com
Specializing in sizes 32-44 band and C- H cup.

 

 

5kisses

xoxo-ashlee

My Favorite Summer Dresses!

I am an avid dress fan and have been since I realized my curves look great in dresses. Pants have ALWAYS been a struggle, so leggings and dresses are my favs. In summer I usually wear a dress 3-5x a week. I dream of a closet just for dresses! HAHA You get my point, I LOVE dresses. So here are some of my fav that I’m currently wearing. Enjoy!

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Torrid Size 2 Maxi Dress.

This maxi dress can be worn day or night. Throw a jacket on and even wear it to work. Very light weight and flows!

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Curvy Sense size 3x off the shoulder dress

Obsessed with the sex appeal of this little number! I would wear this out for drinks or out on a date night! Dress it up more with heels! Shop at Curvy Sense now and use my special discount code “OASHLEE15” for 15% off!

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Torrid size 2 Hi Lo floral dress

I love hi-lo dresses, I think they are cute and fit my body well. I never have to worry about my ass hanging out either! I would wear this casually on the weekend or with a cover up to work.

 

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Torrid size 2 Pineapple Skater dress- Hot pink

I have a million skater dresses! The cut is so flattering to anyone because it accentuates your small waist.  This is another causal look for me but you can dress it up easy with heels or a necklace. From the office out to dinner and drinks would be easy in this.

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Forever 21 size 3x Bodycon Dress

BadaBing Badaboom! This bodycon is defiantly for a night out dancing and shaking it! I used to be nervous about my belly in bodycon dresses, but not anymore. I rock that shit and no one can tell me otherwise. If you were nervous like me go try some on! I promise you’ll start getting into the bodycons. They make you feel like a total babe!

What are your favorite summer dresses?

See more on my Instagram @oashleex

xoxo-ashlee

 

Love your Thighs in Thigh Society Shorts!

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All of us plus ladies know the agony of chubrub! And if you don’t, I envy you! Seriously, this is one thing I am actually self conscious about. Because of my thighs rubbing I get dark spots and sometimes breakouts. I hate it! I have used powders, deodorants and spanx. In the end no chemical has lasted more than 30 minutes and shorts get so sweaty and therefore hold moisture in which rubs my thighs.
 

Size 2x High Rise Black Short

Thigh Society shorts really are unique. They are not spanx, they are lightweight and VERY comfortable. The moisture wicking material is comfortable on the skin and breathable.  Thigh Society shorts keep you dry, so you never have to worrying about leaving a wet mark on a chair or pulling them off with pliers. haha

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Thigh Society shorts come in three styles and three colors that run from a size S-4XL.  All are sold for $34.00, a good price for a quality product that lasts. The three styles have varying lengths at the waist: Mid Rise, High Rise, and Ultra High Rise. I prefer my underthings to go over my belly button, so I got the high rise shorts and they fit great!

Get yours at www.ThighSociety.com ! 

Five kisses for this fabulous product! I’m looking forward to seeing more from Thigh Society! 

This was a sponsored post by ThighSociety. All opinions are my own and are 100% honest as I want to provide real content for my readers. Thank you.

 

HipsandCurves Semi Annual Sale!

Now is the time to load up on some sexy items! Treat yourself this summer! Save up to 70% now until 7/4.

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Here are some of my favs that I will probably grab for these great prices. I just cant help myself when there are such good deals on quality lingerie.

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Melissa Strappy Shelf Bra. Now only $17.95!

 

Because every woman needs a strappy shelf bra! The straps instantly make you feel sexy- I promise you’ll love it!

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Savoir Faire Stretch Lace Garter Belt. Now $7.95!

This is a perfectly feminine and comfortable garter belt. I find so many uncomfortable but because this is full lace it should have stretch and comfort. A staple in my lingerie collection is a good full coverage comfortable garter belt. I need this in every color! hehe

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Spellboud Laceup Bustier. Now $15.95!

This little number is sexy as hell and easy for those not into a lot of work. Because trust me, some lingerie I need a damn assistant to hook me and cinch me and everything else.  The poly spandex fabric adds a bit of support but also comfort and a lot of stretch. The cups are also lightly padded which is perfect.

 

Tell me what your fav picks are! NOW GO AND SHOP!

 

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SHOP NOW! CLICK ON ANY IMAGE

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There are affiliate links throughout the blog, of which I receive a small percentage from a sale. All opinions are my own and are 100% honest as I want to provide real content for my readers. Thank you.

Curvy Kate now shipping to the US!

I have been eyeing Curvy Kate Lingerie for at least a year. As soon as I started seeing photos of the gorgeous sets and heard about the large array of sizes I’ve wanted to get these pieces on my body! Finally my wishes came true and Curvy Kate now ships to the US!

I was gifted three sets from Curvy Kate and am very impressed with the quality, styles, and fit! Each set was a different bra or panty style and I seriously loved them all. If you have never checked out Curvy Kate’s bras the first thing to know is they have a vast variety of sizes. They specialize in large cups that run D- K! Band sizes run from 28-44. Do note that they are a UK company so make sure to check your size in UK sizing. Band width will be the same in US and the UK, but cup size does differ!

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42D Daily Dream Padded Balconette Bra. Size UK 22 cheeky short
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Bra $65 Panty $36

The aqua set was the most comfortable for daily wear. I wore this set the entire day of my shoot and it felt great. The fabric was extra soft and had a decent amount of stretch. The bra also had padding, which I prefer for good coverage on a daily bases.

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42D Vegas Balconette Bra, Size UK 22 Vegas Brazilian Brief
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Bra $66, Panty $35

Can we talk about how much I love mesh! It is so sexy and feminine, so these panties felt amazing! The brazilian cut hugged my ass perfect leaving very little to the imagination. This is a great set to show off, perfect for a special date night. This set will make you love the way you look.

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42D Ellace Balconette Bra, Indigo and size UK 24 Ellace Brazilian, Indigo

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This blue set is also just stunning! This bra does not have any padding so I would not wear it daily, but it would fit great with a silky dress for an evening. Full lace panties hug my hips perfect and cover my ass just enough. Again this piece made me feel so sexy and is meant to be shown off.

Check out Curvy Kate here!

I cannot wait to try more from Curvy Kate ! They also offer swim wear and an additional lingerie selection called Scantilly, which is a bit more R rated. US ladies I promise their items are worth the money! If you are nervous to order from a UK brand, do not be! Contact customer service and they will guide you to the correct size and make suggestions. I can’t say enough what a lovely and friendly company this is. Plus, they strive for all ladies to have sexy well fit lingerie!

5kissesxoxo-ashlee